Kris Vallotton • August 27, 2021

Healing a Fatherless Generation: How You Can Be a Solution

A FATHERLESS EPIDEMIC

We are in the midst of a fatherless epidemic. Fathers have exited the picture; they have not died from war, nor have they returned home. Children are growing up in homes with unstable beams and cracked foundations and have been left to battle the storms of life without the provision they need, the protection of a man, and promotion into their destinies.

One Sunday morning about a year ago as I was praying before service, I heard the phrase “prepare for re-entry.” As I began to try to make sense of what this God-appointed word meant, the scene began to play out on the screen of my sanctified mind like a divine documentary as I watched the prodigal son’s father preparing for his re-entry. The scene opened with the father working in the field raising a fattened calf, gathering fabrics and materials to begin preparing a robe, ring, and sandals for his prodigal son’s return. The father did not labor in vain because it was by faith that he was led to prepare for the return of his son.

You could imagine the years of grief and devastation the family and community felt as the son made decisions to leave his father’s house, waste his father’s money, and ditch relationship with God for the exchange of wild women and ungodly affairs. The father, even in faith filled expectation of his son's return, did not prematurely jump to the occasion to rescue his son from the pigs palace, but allowed for the work of a repentant heart to lead him home. His earthly father did not restore him, but he orchestrated his restoration so that the entire community that was grieved by his decision became the very people that were a part of his restoration. The entire community reestablished his nobility (the robe), purity (the sandals), and his authority (the ring). In this story, the standard he returned to was not the lowered standard set by the effects of his abandonment, rather the tone he returned to was set by the father and now his son would live up to it.

While the vision of the prodigal son was still prevalent in my heart, I began to see a vision of my son. He was in a stadium filled with men teaching the principles of fatherhood, and enacting the rite of passage into true God-given manhood. The vision grew and I began to see stadiums all over the nation filling with men. I texted my son Jason and he replied back: “That is what God has been telling me for a year.”

It was confirmation to me that the Lord is in the midst of orchestrating a monumental movement. Like the father prepared for his prodigal son’s return, the Lord is stirring the hearts of men and preparing a generation to live in the fullness of their potential. Can you imagine a world where men are living in the fullness of their ability and are equipped for the lifelong journey of manhood?

THE GENERATIONAL EFFECT

Now, how does the prodigal parable play into the prophetic proclamation of today? I believe we are in the midst of a Malachi 4:5 moment — the Lord is touching and turning the hearts of fathers towards sons and sons back towards fathers. Malachi foresaw a moment where fathers would be alive, but they wouldn’t be present. I’d propose the pain of a father alive, but choosing not to be present in their child’s life is more painful than the tragic death of a father. The pain of rejection and abandonment is enough, but the lack of guidance and understanding of a man’s calling is affecting the world beyond the four walls of our homes.

The effects of fatherlessness are rampant throughout society. These statistics are shocking and cannot be ignored! It has become heavy on my heart that we must rise to the occasion and be the change among this generation. I hope you allow the reality of these statistics to sink in and you begin to ask the Lord how you can play a vital role in the societal transformation.

63% of youth suicides are from homes without fathers.
90% of all homeless and runaway children grew up without a father.

85% of all children who show behavior disorders come from fatherless homes.

85% of all rapists motivated by displaced anger are from fatherless homes.

71% of all high school dropouts come from homes without a father.

This past week, I sat down for a conversation with my son and founder of BraveCo Jason Vallotton.

A generation of families broken and homes shattered by fatherlessness is apparent in today's society. Jason shared, “The role of a father in a home is to protect, promote, and provide. When you take that out of a home everything becomes unstable and needs go unmet.” As the Lord began to speak to Jason about His heart for men and prophetic mandate to “prepare for re-entry,” Jason became ignited with passion to see a world where men are living out the fullness of their God-given identity, walking in wholeness, and surrounded by a brotherhood of men. Men can no longer be living with broken expectations and understanding of the fullness of who they were created to be. Men, brothers, and fathers are vital for the health and wholeness of our world.

The Lord is working in our midst, doing the deep heart work in men across a generation, it is our job to “prepare for reentry.” What does this look like? This looks like training up the men of a generation to live in the fullness of their God-given identity. Men, you were not meant to walk through manhood alone — God intended for you to have your masculinity poured into by other men, fathers, and mentors throughout the course of your life.

From the passion to see men living in wholeness, purpose, and in community Jason launched BraveCo — a global men’s movement that equips men with the tools necessary for manhood, trains them through discipleship, and gives them opportunities to give back and pour into other men.

BraveCo is a movement of men that are not afraid to get in the foxhole together, take risks, fail forward, and step into our greatest potential. If you’re hungry to understand true masculinity and walk boldly in your God-given manhood, BraveCo is a movement of men that are pursuing wholeness, purpose, and community together; to become the brave men we were created to be and walk boldly in their God-given manhood. I want to encourage you to check out BraveCo's free 30-day challenge. You’ll receive tools and resources to help you break free from anxiety and depression, boost your confidence as a man, and help you build a successful future. This is a great foundation for the journey of manhood.

I pray that no matter what your story is, if you have had the greatest male role models or if you have been left in lack by the abandonment or loss of a father that the Lord would begin speaking and healing the places of your heart. I encourage you to allow him to step in and be your Heavenly Father that is capable of abundantly more than we could ever ask or imagine.

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Kathy's Mother's Day Message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

Character and Gifting: Favor with God and Favor with Man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 Lessons After 50 Years of Marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

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