Kris Vallotton • September 10, 2021

Why Every Leader Needs Self-reflection

THE UNLIKELY LEADER

Sometimes you meet a natural born leader — one that leads the pack, takes the reins, and makes everyone feel secure and safe. Then sometimes we see the unlikely hero rise to the scene, the one that is quiet, sits in the back, and comes from a broken home. Maybe you have questioned your own ability to lead or wondered if you have what it takes. I would propose everyone is a leader; whether you are leading yourself, another person, a family, or a country.

The Bible is filled with unlikely leaders; consider the life of Moses, a fugitive at birth who became the greatest lawgiver in history. Or the life of David, once an insignificant shepherd boy wandering in the field who became one of history’s most famous kings. The list is endless of people stepping into a throne that are not “fit for the crown.” There is a leader deep within you with a distinct blueprint needed for the world around you to succeed and it may not look like “sitting on a throne in a fancy red robe” but, the truth is you are already sitting in heavenly places, with access to the greatest Leader of them all.

I did not always “feel” like a leader and the path I was on did not look like it would ever lead to one of significance and esteem. The home I grew up in was unstable, the foundation was broken by the loss of my father, and the beams were shattered by the abuse of my stepfathers. If the picture is not already clear, my life was not one that should have naturally led to owning multiple businesses, or leading a global movement. Rather, I was a poor young man looking for purpose and someone to show me the way. But, even in the midst of my mess I look back on the course of my life and I see the hand of God molding and shaping the leader in me.

TRANSFORMING THE WORLD WITHIN YOU

I want to pull back the curtain and share a few insights on my journey in leadership; not just 5 tips to great leadership, but real life moments, accomplishments, and encounters that I hope inspire the leader in you and show you that you can do it too. The life you are living is filled with significance and purpose, and will have generational impact.

(In this week’s video blog I answer questions and share more insight into my journey in leadership. )

As I already mentioned, my childhood was extremely traumatic. This was my reality until everything in my life drastically changed. At the age of 18 I was living a life that was built around promoting myself, in pain from my past, and serving my own flesh. But, then suddenly I met the Lord and no longer was I living a life that would lead to death, instead I was learning to lead a life that reflected and responded to the glory of God. One of my greatest keys to leadership has been this very moment in my life. Serving the Lord of Lords will teach you how to serve and love His children. Leadership is so much more than a title; in the Kingdom, leadership equals servanthood. You must learn to serve well if you want to be a great leader. What does it look like to be a servant leader? It looks like Jesus; stopping for the one, loving your enemies, and being deeply connected to the heart of God.

The truth is, the world is filled with leaders that are eager to lead a movement of people and obtain a status, but do not know how to lead themselves. I would argue to this day one of my greatest leadership responsibilities is leading my life and my family before I lead anyone else. No, this may not lead to a recognized title in the world’s eyes, but neither did the life of Jesus. They could not believe the illegitimate son that associated with the unclean could be the Savior. What I am getting at is often leadership looks far different from what the world has made it out to be. It is important that we do not miss our first line of responsibility; our family. If you do not lead and steward your own life and family how are you to be entrusted with much? It is vital that we become aware of how we are stewarding and leading our own life, heart, and the family that God has given us.

Now, let me be clear – I did not just give my life to God and immediately become a servant leader and know how to lead my family let alone a global movement; there were still pieces of my own selfish desires, impatience, and arrogance that got in the way. But, I was surrounded by people and mentors that loved me when I was still in my mess. They mined for the gold in me and pulled it to the surface; they did not settle for the dirt and grime they fought to see it washed away. These are the kinds of people everyone needs in their life — the ones that do not settle for anything less than the best they see in us; the iron that sharpens iron. To this day, I surround myself with friends that have different strengths than me and are not afraid to call out the imperfect places in me. These are the kinds of friendships that will produce the leader that lives inside of each one of us.

A DEGREE IN LEADERSHIP

Beyond any position or title in a leadership book, self-help manual, or degree in leadership, if you do not have connection with God you have nothing. If we are going to have anything to offer as a leader; connection with the Heavenly Father matters. Now let me be clear, connection with God is more than mystical moments and angelic visitations; it is the million small moments throughout our life. You may not have a mountain top experience everyday, but if you don’t purpose to spend time with God you definitely won’t. I encourage you to open your Bible in the morning or at night and read a chapter or two. This has been a life line in my life and I believe it is the steam to the engine of leadership. The Word of God is alive — no matter how many times you have read the chapter or heard the scripture there is always more to receive. When you are on the rocky boat of leadership and you don’t know which way is north, connection with God will be your saving source. The reality of being a perfect leader is a hard scale to try to measure up to. You may not always know the right answer or be the head leader in the room, but when God is your lifeline you will have an endless source of heavenly insight and wisdom. The truth is, God strategically places His people and He equips the called, but I encourage you to lean back into His wisdom and strength and do not try to do it all on your own.

I want to encourage you today, if the waves of life or leadership have knocked you down there is still hope for today. The Lord is filled with endless solutions and possibilities. I pray that the despair of failure is filled with fresh hope from God and that perseverance becomes your strength. Not every attempt we make will succeed, but failure is our friend in disguise if we allow it to fuel our perseverance and faith to see the Lord move in our lives.

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Kathy's Mother's Day Message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

Character and Gifting: Favor with God and Favor with Man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 Lessons After 50 Years of Marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

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