Kris Vallotton • May 7, 2021

A Mom's Love Does Not Return Void: a Guest Post by Kathy Vallotton

THE REAL WORLD CHANGERS

Mothers have a unique call and gifting! I have been surrounded by mothers that have supported me my whole life. My own mother lost her husband and the love of her life at 20 years old. Despite her circumstances, she paved a life full of kindness and perseverance. My mom was my greatest support and most faithful friend. I’d propose mothers are the life-saving and world-changing agents we all have experienced; if we all loved and served like them the world would be a better place.

In honor of Mother’s Day, I asked my wife and the incredible mother of our four children, Kathy Vallotton, to share a story from her new book The Good, the God, and the Ugly . I wanted her to share with you how she has processed not only the joys and triumphs of motherhood, but also the pain and disappointment . I hope you feel encouraged, loved, and celebrated today.

A Note From Kathy:

I became a mother at 18 years old; it was my lifelong dream — yet, I felt far from qualified. Kris and I brought our first baby girl home from the hospital and were in awe and wonder at what our life as parents would entail. After raising four children and 10 grandchildren, I can tell you now it is my greatest joy and has been my deepest pain. It can feel like you are the anchor to a ship that has sailed into a never-ending storm. It is not always easy; I know in my parenting days it has often felt like with every triumph there is a challenge and with every frustration there is new hope.

However, with over 45 years of parenting under our belts now, I want to encourage all the moms out there. Whether, you are a biological mother, spiritual mother, stepmother, or godmother you are loved and cherished. The love you pour out each day to the children you have been given does not return void.

I learned early on; the world is in need of mothers — the call of a mom goes beyond serving and nurturing our own children. One of the most powerful lessons I learned as a mom and we learned as a family was that miracles are commonly discovered in “the land of risk,” and there are few things riskier than inviting strangers into your home to live with you. In the first 18 years of our marriage, our guests often outnumbered our own children. This dynamic thrust us into the adventure of a lifetime, where there was never a dull moment at the Vallotton home.

So much of our passion to touch the homeless, help the broken, and free the captives was inspired by a young, radical Jesus freak named Tracy Evans . Tracy really became part of our family. One day she came home from work and began telling me about a girl she had met whom I will refer to as “Sharon” (not her real name). Tracy was working as a nurse at the local hospital, where she met Sharon. Tracy shared with me that Sharon had ended up in the hospital because she was all cut up from running into some sharp pieces of trash in the dark. (There was a lot more to that story, none of it good.) She had no family to speak of, and on top of all that, it was her birthday.

Sharon’s situation touched me deeply. I felt sorry for her, and compassion gushed out of me like an untamed river. But I could feel there was more to the story. Tracy shared with me “she’s been involved in satanism, and she’s really confused. What she needs is a secure, loving family to live with for a while.” My mama’s heart was moved just thinking of how a loving family could impact Sharon’s life. After a long discussion, Kris and I came to the decision she could stay with us for one week at most.

WHEN YOU DON’T SEE THE FRUIT OF IT

When Sharon arrived at our house it soon became apparent that she was streetwise but had very little in the way of common sense or family values...

In fact, I don’t think those were even in her vocabulary. I concluded that I was going to have to put on my big-girl pants because this lady needed me to show her some good, strong, motherly love.

Remember, how we said she could only stay for a week at most? Well, days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months as Sharon slowly integrated into our family. She was learning about the love of God and was experiencing miracles right in front of her eyes. Sharon lived with us for months, and all of us were changed by the transforming power of God’s love evident in her life. She became a different person during her time in our home, but sadly, a while later she turned back to her old life and got lost in darkness.

This truly left us devastated. I couldn’t believe that someone who had experienced the depth of the Father’s love like she had in the last few months could retreat to their old ways of darkness so quickly. I have learned that one of the side effects of a life of miracles and faith is disappointment. Disappointment not so much because the miracle you are believing for does not take place (although that certainly happens at times), but more often because the people who experience a bona fide act of God don’t always change.

Yet amid the disappointment that comes from taking a risk, is the joy that comes from loving people right where they are. Jesus was our greatest example of God’s love being poured out without expecting anything in return. Some of us plant, some water and others are there for the harvest. Every time we reach out toward someone in love, we are making a difference in his or her life, whether we see the fruit of it or not.

A MOTHER’S DAY ENCOURAGEMENT

I want to encourage all you mamas out there to remember that every act of love and service sown into your kids is healing hearts, laying foundations, and building a legacy we may not live to see. There is incredible purpose in every meal you make and bedtime story you read; lives are being changed, and remember the Lord is their Father watching after their every move. He is our greatest mom support; with Him, we can conquer giants and slay dragons.

Today my prayer is that the mamas out there feel the peace of the Father and joy of the Lord as you love and nurture your children. I pray you feel the subtle nudge from our heavenly Father as He whispers to you “good job.”

Blessings to all of you this Mother’s Day. I would love to hear in the comments below how a mother has impacted and shaped your life.

< Older Post

Newer Post >

THE BLOG

Discover more blog posts

kathy's mother's day message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

character and gifting: favor with god and favor with man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 lessons after 50 years of marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

NEWSLETTER