Kris Vallotton • March 12, 2021

3 Things to Do When You Feel Like You're on the Verge of a Crisis

HOW TO FIND YOUR FIGHT

If you’ve ever battled with the weight of depression , you know it can feel like the thief in the night who came to steal all your joy and drive for life. This is what depression was like for me; it robbed me of any drive for life, and I was beat-down on my couch for seven months. Horrible thoughts would fill my mind; I constantly questioned if I’d ever “kick” this or if I’d ever feel like myself again.

The truth is, we are triune beings : we have a body, soul, and spirit all with their own specific needs. The challenge is we often compartmentalize the needs of our body, soul, and spirit without realizing how they affect each other—this is how my mental and emotional health battle began. My family had been in a very difficult season that lasted for over two years; the ongoing trials eventually began to weigh me down. What started as a couple of months of sleepless nights turned into a full-blown mental and emotional crisis. Without any sleep, for months my physical body was exhausted. Beyond that, continually thinking of the crises my family was facing in their own lives depleted my soul. What I am getting at is what started off as a physical battle rooted in a need for more sleep turned into an out-right emotional breakdown affecting my whole personhood.

Depression is not a fair fight; it sends you to war without weapons and robs your desire to survive. It places you in a trench of hopelessness and traps you in chains of fear that perpetuate the problem and form a false perception of reality. Let me be clear, I am not talking about having a few difficult days. If what I’m describing has become a pattern for weeks or months of your life, my encouragement to you is to take action! When you take action you will begin to find the weapons to fight a fair fight.

I share more about how I found help in seasons of depression and anxiety in this video blog:

In a nutshell:

I’ve had seasons of both emotional and mental health crises.
I experienced an emotional breakdown that lasted three years and a mental health battle that lasted 7 months.
We are interconnected; spirit, soul, and body. Each one affects the other.
Warfare is normal but it is not should not be a lifestyle.
If you don’t sleep, your brain doesn’t have time to recover.
It is important to begin to picture the good that God has for you in place of the lies that fill your mind.
When you are depressed, often the things you need to do are the very things you don’t want to do.
It is important to empathize with someone that is depressed or anxious.
When someone is depressed they need to be encouraged to stay motivated.

3 PRACTICAL WAYS TO FIGHT DEPRESSION

The challenge is, when you are struggling with depression, the things you need to do in order to get well are often the very things you do not want to do. However, I’d propose that it’s possible that the lack of desire to take care of yourself is the very thing that is keeping you trapped in a box of depression and chained to anxiety . Sometimes finding a breakthrough from depression may not be as simple as going for one walk or eating a nutritious meal, but rather a persistent process of loving yourself well over months. It is an intentional decision to tend to the needs of your whole personhood-your body, soul, and spirit.

I want to share some practical advice on how to take action and find the weapons to win the war in your mind. I know the thought of doing anything can feel absolutely impossible—at least it did to me!

1. Go to the doctor.

It is important to see a medical health professional and have a complete physical and blood work done that includes a hormone test. It is critical to know if the chemicals in your brain are unbalanced or malfunctioning in order to receive proper help. This is one of the first steps to a breakthrough. Sometimes, you need medication for a period of time to get the help you need; there is no shame in this. I think of it like this: if you had diabetes we would not just tell you to just spend some more time in prayer instead of taking the insulin that your body needs (unless of course, you are healed). In the same way, if your brain needs certain chemicals to function properly it is important to make sure you take them.

2. Read books.

Having a better understanding of brain chemistry and how your brain works is extremely insightful. This is what inspired me to reach out to a doctor and find the help I needed. I highly recommend From Panic to Power: Proven Techniques to Calm Your Anxieties, Conquer Your Fears, and Put You in Control of Your Life by Lucinda Bassett and Who Switched My Brain Off? Controlling Toxic Thoughts and Emotions by Dr. Caroline Leaf.

3. Take care of your body.

Sleep is where your brain recovers. If you go too long without enough sleep, it begins to stop working properly. Once you get enough sleep, you’ll begin to be able to differentiate which thought is your own and which is from the enemy. It is also very important to eat properly and exercise even if you don’t feel like it initially. Lastly, make sure to spend time in sunlight to increase your serotonin levels.

I want to encourage you if you are struggling with a mental health struggle, and you cannot see how this will ever possibly end, that in Luke 6:21 it says, “Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied. Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.” This too shall pass!

HOW TO BE THERE FOR SOMEONE IN A MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS

Lastly, if you know of someone that is struggling with their emotional or mental health make it your mission to love them well. Sometimes this might need to be tough love. This could look like making them come on a walk with you even when that is the last thing they want to do or cooking them a meal and making sure they eat it. Most importantly, it is about being a voice of hope, reminding them this too shall pass.

What are things you find helpful if you are feeling depressed? I would love to hear your testimony of overcoming any mental health battle in the comments below.

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Kathy's Mother's Day Message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

Character and Gifting: Favor with God and Favor with Man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 Lessons After 50 Years of Marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

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