Kris Vallotton • November 30, 2022

3 Common Ways We Tend the Needs of Our Soul || Why Proactively Caring for Your Soul is Important

WHY YOUR SOUL MATTERS

Have you ever desired to live a spirit-led life? Maybe even with great intention, you ditched the needs of your heart and soul in order for your spirit to grow. I know many Believers who have spent their whole lives working to “not live by the flesh”. We have become excellent at the outward appearance of spirituality, but our souls and body have been neglected. A product in response is a Church dressed in a play pretend costume, perfecting its ability to neglect a vital piece of its tridimensional being.

In the Church at large, we take care of our spirits, and some may even take good care of their bodies, but our souls are often the most neglected parts of our beings. Our souls are where our metaphorical hearts live. I am fully convinced that our hearts (souls) know things that our bodies and spirits are completely unaware of. The heart feels its way through life and is sensitive to emotions. It is the home where things like love, passion, and mercy live.

I’d propose the neglect of our souls is rooted in a distorted perception of our flesh, but the piece we’re missing is that when we were saved we became new creations. You are a new creation! That means that all of you became new when you received salvation. Not just your spirit, but your soul included.

So, it is time to adjust our thinking — we need to be whole on the inside, so we can be real on the outside. No more pretenders. No more Captain America wannabes. No more stage actors! We need our souls to thrive in order to live in the fullness of what Christ paid for.

You might be sitting there wondering where to begin. How do you approach the needs of your soul when you have been disconnected from them for so long? I first want to address three main ways we tend to approach meeting the needs of our souls: inactively, reactively, or proactively.

THREE WAYS WE TEND TO THE NEEDS OF OUR SOUL

Inactive: You are inactive when you remain ignorant of the condition of your soul. In the inactive mindset, you embrace your desperate need as an unwanted yet necessary part of life’s process. Then you work hard to convince yourself that love, acceptance, attention, approval, and significance are not necessities but choices that can be opted out of. Maybe you don’t try to meet the needs of your soul because you want to be spiritual, so you wear your dysfunction as a badge of honor. Or worse yet, you bury your needs so deep that you can’t consciously remember where you even put them. Life just happens to you when you live inactively. Eventually, you find your soul existing in brokenness, emptiness, and loneliness.

Reactive: You are reactive when you acknowledge your soul’s needs but then fulfill the needs in dysfunctional ways. This is the proverbial “looking for love in all the wrong places” scenario. Living reactively often leads to all kinds of extremely dysfunctional devices that never fulfill your need to be known deeply or your desire to be loved for who you are. The fruit of this reactive lifestyle may be sexual promiscuity, pornography, fantasy, selfish ambition, and so on . . . anything that gives you the sense of being known, feeling powerful, and feeling loved. Yet instant gratification has horrible side effects! Typically people who live this way for any length of time have a trail full of broken relationships that follow them.

Proactive: You are proactive when you wisely assess the needs of your soul and then devise a healthy strategy to meet your needs. Metaphorically speaking, you stop eating out of dumpsters, and you start planning your meals.

DEVELOPING A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SOUL

A great place to start when desiring to get in touch with the needs of your soul so that you can live proactively is to understand the power of love. You need a deep understanding and acceptance of love to seep so powerfully into your soul that it overflows out of you and into the hearts of others. Let’s first take a look at David’s relationship with his soul.

David, the man after God’s own heart, was extraordinarily in touch with the needs of his soul, and consequently, his soul loved God. Look at the way David talked to his soul:

Why are you in despair, O my soul?

And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him

For the help of His presence.

(Psalm 42:5)

After a time of deep distress, David’s soul was bragging about the Lord! Even when he is wandering in a literal desert, David has soul-ish ways:

O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. (Psalm 63:1)

Did you catch that? David’s soul hungered for God, and the guy wasn’t even born again! There are hundreds of references to the soul of David loving on God. I am convinced that your heart can take you places your head can never go! The teacher in Proverbs put it like this: Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. (Proverbs 3:5)

Did you notice the wisest man in the world clearly said that we must trust God with our hearts, not our heads? In fact, he went on to say that we shouldn’t put a lot of weight on what we understand. So is love always a feeling we can logically comprehend or is it sometimes something only our soul experiences?

Ephesians 3:16–19 says, “[the Father] would grant you . . . to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God”.

First of all, we are supposed to be rooted and grounded in love. In other words, the core foundation of everything we believe, do, say, live, and experience must flow from love, be motivated by love, and be grounded in love. And we are not to be rooted and grounded in just any love, but in the agape love of God, that must be experienced to be comprehended (agape is the Greek word for God’s love).

You are also invited to comprehend the love of God that’s beyond comprehension. Check it out one more time: “to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge.” This is the place where the infinite transcends the finite, the supernatural infuses the biological, and the heart is enlightened to the secret dimensions of His passion for you! You heard me right; He is wild about you! He didn’t just die for you; He lives for you. In fact, He lives in you, around you, and through you.

Has your soul been living inactively, reactively, or proactively? Have there been areas of your life where you need to ditch the need to understand and embrace the love of God that surpasses knowledge? I want to challenge you today to assess how you have been living and invite the Lord into your journey of breakthrough!

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Kathy's Mother's Day Message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

Character and Gifting: Favor with God and Favor with Man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 Lessons After 50 Years of Marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

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